Just for fun, let's all list:
TEN THINGS THAT ANNOY ME
- People who shave off their real eyebrows and pencil fake ones in. (An exception is made for those who have lost their eyebrows for medical reasons or due to overzealous plucking... but only if it was unintentional.)
- Bicyclists, walkers, and runners who have zero awareness of the cars around them. I know it's the responsibility of drivers to watch out, but one distraction or unexpected movement = road pancake. You'd think they'd be more observant seeing as they wouldn't win that fight.
- Overweight people who wear too-small shirts... especially when you can see their belly hanging out the bottom. I have sympathy for overweight people, being one myself, but at least I buy shirts that cover what they are supposed to cover.
- People who suddenly become big fans/best friends of the recently deceased when they didn't know or like them before their deaths. This is a specific reaction to the Michael Jackson thing, but I've seen it over and over with non-famous people, like the time when a guy I went to high school with died and all the sudden people who had never spoken to him before were sobbing in the halls and skipping school to go to the funeral. I feel like it is insulting to those who actually did know and care about the person when they were alive.
- Waiters/waitresses who steal your plates when you're not done with them, or who harass you constantly about taking the plate... especially when they act like it's for your own good. "I'll get this out of your way." Thanks, "Tad," but it really wasn't in my way at all. It's a restaurant. I EXPECT to have plates in front of me. It's like a prop.
- Making a big deal about politicians' extramarital affairs. Sure, they did a bad thing, but it's NONE OF MY BUSINESS. And, furthermore, I DON'T CARE. And, further-furthermore, I just feel bad for the politician's spouse, who would probably much rather we didn't spread the news of their shame all over the world. This is between the politician, his or her spouse, and God. Nobody else needs to hear about it.
- Reality shows that consist entirely of following people around. News flash: your life just isn't that interesting. And if it IS interesting, then it's only interesting because it's a train wreck and everyone is heckling you when they watch. The only exception to this was MTV's "The Real World," back during the first few seasons when it was still a new, fresh idea. After a while, it became as bad as the rest of them.
- Flamboyantly gay men: the type who wear sequins and tight pants and prance around lisping and carrying purses and saying, "Oh yes, Girl-FRAAAAND" all the time. I know it's only a very small percentage of gay people who act this way, but they're the ones you see on TV. You are certainly not helping gay-straight relations with all that tomfoolery.
- People who rate good romance novels poorly solely on the basis that there aren't many sex scenes. If you're only reading for the sex scenes and don't care about how good the rest of the story is, then perhaps you're reading the wrong genre of novel, if you know what I mean. Your local bookstore clerk can point you to the correct section. And then laugh at you behind your back.
- I'm running a race this weekend, and if I hear ONE MORE SPECTATOR say, "Bringing up the rear, eh? Heh, heh, heh." as I go by, I am going to have to get a DNF (Did Not Finish) for the race due to being arrested for punching a spectator. I may be in last place, but you're ugly, and I can get faster. Losers.
So, what annoys you?
Comments (3)
You pretty well covered things that annoy me, too. But I will try to come up with more later. Good luck with your race tomorrow. I wish I could be there to watch you ccross the finish line. Take names of the hecklers and we will send hexes upon them. Happy 4th of July !!!!
How on earth can a spectator, one who is NOT running but is merely STANDING, have the nerve to heckle an actual runner? May I suggest flashing them "The Bird?"
Your list is terrific! I'll work on mine.
Things that annoy Mama and Alicia
1. Cars that rush to pass you, then slow down when they get ahead of you.
2. Cavemen Geiko commercials (Mama)
3. The money with eyes Geiko commercials (Alicia)
4. People who stand so far back from the counter at fast food places that you can't tell whether they are in line. Then, if you assume that they are not in line and move in front of them, they glare at you.
5. When people get waited on before you and you got there before they did.
6. You get in a short check-out-line, but then they have to check the price on something (or run out of money, or have to get a check approved, or change check-out people, or the tape on the machine runs out) and it takes forever.
7. Little kids that run around in restaurants (or scream).
8. When the Dean wants you to provide her with some info immediately, and you have neither the time nor the necessary info at hand.
9. When a TV show only has 3 different commercials that they play over and over and over (and over) again.
10. My scales (Mama)
11. Doctors who don't believe you when you tell them that you are doing everything they told you to do.
12. When you have an appointment at 2:00 but don't get in until 4:20. Note that if YOU were late, they would just cancel the appointment.
13. When you go to a fancy schmancy store rather than el cheapo because you think the service will be better, but it's not.
14. When you go to a fancy schmancy store and the clerks look down their nose at you because you are wearing jeans, a T-shirt and ratty shoes. Hey---I can still afford the occasional fancy schmancy item.
15. When the neighbor's dog growls at me in my own yard.
16. When I have 2 pairs of good sunglasses and one pair that is falling apart and I can only find the pair that is falling apart.
17. Daughters who do not call their Mothers often enough.
18. Grandchildren who do not call their grandmothers often enough.
19. When your mother rips the keyboard away from you and types whatever she wants.
20. Pop-ups.